Creekbank Stories Curt Iles, Storyteller
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The Sign Phantom of Dry Creek
From the book, The Old House, by Curt Iles
It all began in the Spring of 1974, just prior to my high school graduation.
A rainy April had kept the local streams flooded in “Dry Creek.” (The world’s most overworked cliché, “Well, how wet is it in Dry Creek?”)
One afternoon, I went down to the green “Dry Creek” sign that informs northbound travelers that they are entering our community. Over the “Dry” in Dry Creek, I taped a white poster board sign saying “Wet.” It now read “Wet Creek.”
It was widely noticed and laughed at by everyone.
The Lake Charles American Press even ran a picture of the sign in a story commenting on our wet spring.
The caption read in part, “The Highway Department is looking for the ‘wag’ that placed this sign, in defiance of regulations prohibiting the defacing of public signs.”
First of all, I had to look up the word “wag.”
This caused me to hide my sign authorship, but for some reason, everyone in Dry Creek knew I’d done it.
Shortly after that, I placed another sign. This sign (to appease my humor-challenged highway department friends) was tied by hay string to the signposts below the Dry Creek sign.
It read:
Fun City, U.S.A.
Fun City, U.S.A.
This sign was meant as a final tribute to my soon-to-be former home, as the prodigal left “the sticks” for bigger and better things in college.
To understand this sign, you must know something about Dry Creek—both the stream and the community.
The creek called Dry Creek is a small, muddy, steep-banked stream that meanders through the southeast corner of Beauregard Parish. It is not very wide, deep, or pretty.
It was first named by the Indians. One old timer related to how he’d been told the Indians really called it “Beautiful Creek,” but the English translation got messed up and came out as “Dry Creek.”
Others claim the more traditional story that the creek’s name comes from the fact that it dries up in places in very hot weather.
Then, there is the geographical area known as Dry Creek.
To call the community of Dry Creek a “town” is a gross exaggeration. Dry Creek is simply an intersection of two highways. We have a post office, a church Camp, two stores, and some really good churches, but very little in the way of commerce or industry.
Not much exciting has ever happened in our community. Therefore, so calling Dry Creek, “Fun City, U.S.A.” was to make light of what most anyone would agree is a quiet and boring community.
Later, during the fall of 1974, I returned home from college and was informed that “my signs” had continued to appear. My pleas of innocence were met with knowing smiles and winks. According to local folks, these signs had continued to appear at the same location, poking fun at our community with such gems as:
“Hee Haw Filmed Here,”
“Airport Next Exit,”
“Famous for Nothing.”
Even though no one believed my repeated denials, I had a good idea who the real sign phantom was.
Later that year, on another visit home, I saw a new sign, and both the humor and handwriting gave it away. This sign related to the predicted “swine flu” epidemic that was of grave concern in 1975.
Doctors were advising many people, especially the elderly to receive vaccines. This new sign read:
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“We ain’t gonna give our hogs no flu shots.”
I immediately knew my father was the sign phantom. My dad, a highway department worker and church deacon, reluctantly admitted to me that he had continued the sign tradition.
I’d always know, even without seeing him, when he was preparing a sign by the sound, from the back room, of him laughing softly as the squeaking and smell of the magic marker as a new sign was being prepared.
His signs continued on their themes of small-town life and country values, such as:
“Shop our Modern Mall,”
“It Sure Ain’t Heaven,”
and “Toll Bridge- One Mile Ahead.”
Our longtime postmaster, Kat King, told of a stranger stopping at the post office for directions on how to avoid the toll bridge.
Legend has it that a lady wanted to know how to get to the nearby mall.
The signs continued, and the legend of the Sign Phantom grew. I was still the number one suspect, and no manner of denying could stop folks from believing it. All of my alibis about being away from Dry Creek were not believed. I don’t believe anyone even suspected my quiet and respectable dad.
Even though our community is small, many travelers pass through Dry Creek on their way to DeRidder or Bundick Lake. The story of the signs at the Dry Creek bridge began to spread throughout southwest Louisiana. Folks would stop in at the store to comment on the signs and even complain if no sign was up.
(Some signs, especially those controversial, never stayed up very long. Any sign commenting on hunting, religion, or Edwin Edwards was quickly ripped down.) But this never bothered the Sign Phantom of Dry Creek, who never seemed to have writer’s block or run out of new ideas.
One lady from Westlake, who traveled our way weekly to her fishing camp, sent a letter addressed to the Dry Creek Chamber of Commerce.
For anyone to think we had a Chamber of Commerce really tickled us. Her letter had many questions about the signs. She said that each week her entire family began leaning forward in their seats to see what the latest sign said. She listed these as her favorites:
“We Have a Fine Sense of Rumor,”
“Crossroads to Nowhere,”
and “First Annual Fire Ant Festival Next Week.”
“Crossroads to Nowhere,”
and “First Annual Fire Ant Festival Next Week.”
Many times the Sign Phantom commented on current events:
“Killer Bees- Death Awaits You Here” (As the dreaded killer bees approached Texas)
and “Protected by Patriot Missiles” (During Operation Desert Storm).
Additional social comments were made on signs such as:
Gun control- “Our wives, maybe. Our guns, never!”
The lottery- “Waiting for the lottery to make us all rich.”
Hunting- “Do not shoot squirrels that wave or smile at you.”
And even professional wrestling- “Don’t tell us that wrestling is fake!”
Gun control- “Our wives, maybe. Our guns, never!”
The lottery- “Waiting for the lottery to make us all rich.”
Hunting- “Do not shoot squirrels that wave or smile at you.”
And even professional wrestling- “Don’t tell us that wrestling is fake!”
One of my personal favorites concerns an event that took place at that time. Up in a bay in Washington State, three whales were trapped and could not swim out due to the shallow water at the bay entrance. For several weeks, the national news media kept Americans informed about the whales’ plight. Volunteers from groups such as Greenpeace stayed at the bay, attempting to help the whales.
That same week, a sign appeared on the Dry Creek sign:
“Help save the three gar trapped in Bundick Lake.”
“Help save the three gar trapped in Bundick Lake.”
All in all, the hundreds of signs posted at the bridge were a commentary about our world during the 1970s and 1980s and Dry Creek’s (or, more specifically, my dad’s) reaction to it.
Some of the signs were not understood by Dry Creek natives. One older resident questioned Daddy about a 1990. “Clayton, what does that sign ‘We Dance with Coyotes’ mean?’”
As I think of the many signs over the years, I recall my all-time favorite. It can best be appreciated by an outsider driving through our community:
“Don’t laugh. Your daughter may marry a Dry Creek Boy” 
I bet my mother-in-law up in north Louisiana and many other parents who’ve lost a daughter to a Dry Creek boy can really appreciate that sign penned by the Sign Phantom of Dry Creek.
During the early 1990s, the Highway Department sometimes came and moved the Dry Creek sign away from the bridge and closer to the community. They placed it right across from Turner’s Grocery.
That is when Daddy quit putting up his signs. He said the residents’ dogs barked too much when he went to this new location at night. However, the legend of the Sign Phantom still lives on in the community of Dry Creek, Louisiana, better known as “Fun City, USA.”
Enjoyed “The Sign Phantom?”
You can view an exhaustive list of the Sign Phantom at
What’s your favorite sign and why?
Are there any signs needing explanation to a non-Southerner/Dry Creeker?
I’d love to hear from you at curt@creekbank.net
Those were the “good ol’ days”! As many others have said, “I couldn’t wait to pass through Dry Creek again to see what the next sign would say”. Of course, it was always disappointing to see no sign up. Who cared whether it was my best friend Curt or his dad Bro. Clayton. We just wanted to smile and laugh. As it’s been said, “Laughter is the best medicine”!
Curt, Nicki and I spent saturday morning laughing until we cried reading the sign phantom’s work. May his tribe increase!
Curt,
The Dry Creek signs remind me of everything good about your family. I remember feeling such a part of that family as we spent New Year’s Day with ya’ll. When your Dad included me in the football pool, I knew that he felt toward my family as his own. His kindness is always remembered by all the family here in Florida and Alabama. By the way, no one got more joy from his signs than he did – it let his rascal side get free from his conservative side and roam free for a little bit.
Our love to all yours – especially your Mom.
Bro. Kermit